From Scheduling Nightmare to Self-Care Bliss: How to Be the Sole Survivor of Your Overwhelmed Life 🙌🏾
Picture this: You’re sitting at your desk reviewing your schedule for the week. Your daughter calls & springs having to stay after school for the rest of the week for a club she’s involved in…on top of cheerleading practice & gymnastics. You’re behind on your household duties & are in desperate need of a date with your other half. Not to mention, you started a business recently & are in the process of getting it organized. All of this equals a scheduling nightmare, leaving you feeling overwhelmed & burnt out. 😫
This is the story of my life. I overcommit, overextend, & overwhelm myself trying to keep the S on my chest capital. Can’t even blame others when I’m the one agreeing to do things & be places without considering how many other tasks I’m handling at that time. It seems like an unending cycle 🔄…until I remember to use the tricks & tools I’ve obtained over the years as a busy woman. Follow me now…
Scheduling Nightmare: You Did It, Honey! 🤦🏽♀️
Women are natural nurturers. We’re mothering even when we don’t mean to. We’re wifing even when the effort isn’t reciprocated. We’re sistering to help our tribe hold it all together. However, we frequently forget to nurture the most important person in the equation: yourself. 🫵🏽
Failing to nurture yourself is deadly! 🪦 We’ve all heard “put your oxygen mask on first before assisting others” & “you can’t pour from an empty cup,” but let’s throw another one in there: “self-care isn’t selfish.” It’s become one of my frequently used sayings. It’s so easy to stay in grind mode & end up broken down after going hard for weeks, so we need to remind ourselves to put more effort into taking care of ourselves (myself included). Hell, I have my foot partway in that pool as we speak.
Even with you swearing you’re Superwoman & can do it all, only to come to the realization that you’re dog tired, you have to have a keep it real convo with yourself. Stand in the mirror & say 🪞, “Self, you’re juggling a lot, & even though you may feel like you’re accomplishing so much, don’t get it twisted. YOU’RE BURNT OUT, &&&&&&& it’s all your fault!”
When you say “your fault,” you’re not talking about dem chirren & their ridiculously busy schedules. You’re not talking about your job “having you” work overtime. And you’re definitely not talking about your boo thang who may not be available to help you as much as you need. You’re talking about that person staring back at you in the mirror: Y.O.U.! 🙋🏽♀️
You have to take responsibility for saying “yes” so much. Hold yourself accountable for giving your boss & coworkers the impression that you’ll always be Ms. Dependable. It’s not boo thang’s fault that you stay quiet as a church mouse when you need to ask for help. It’s you, sis! 💯
The Game Plan for Crushing the Scheduling Nightmare 👩🏽💻
Never fear, my Evolvers…ya girl has a plan that kicks scheduling nightmares straight through the goal post! 🏈 Now, it took me awhile to really learn the importance of prioritizing self-care, but now that I’ve gotten a pretty good grasp on it, things have balanced out a bit better.
A few things that I did were:
- 🫰🏽Learned that self-care is essential, not a luxury: You don’t earn self-care; you just snatch it up by the collar & take whatever you please! If you don’t put self-care into a regular rotation, your mind, body, & spirit will suffer. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve understood the truth of that statement.
- 💰Realized self-care doesn’t have to be expensive: You don’t always have to spend money for self-care. That’s the biggest myth out there! Even the little things are considered self-care because they refresh you (i.e., taking a nap or going for a walk). There’s no universal right way to do it; the right way is your way. I’ve embraced balancing my free tasks with my expensive ones, & it’s worked out fine.
- 🚫 One of the most powerful words in the dictionary is also one of the shortest: NO: I struggle sometimes with this one. It’s natural for me to help folks, especially when I care about them or something needs to be done efficiently. But I’ve also experienced being taken advantage of because I’m willing to be a Rescue Ranger. Don’t allow people to wear you out or guilt trip you into doing something you’d rather not do. The more you say “no,” the easier it becomes to not feel guilty.
- 🔂 Get a routine going: If you work a bit of self-care into your daily routine, you’ll feel less burnt out. I started a morning & nighttime routine at the beginning of the year, & it definitely has helped my mindset. I get up at 4:30 Monday-Friday to meditate, read devotionals, do a 5 minute yoga session, read affirmations, workout a few days, & not have to rush to clock in at 7. I also read the Bible, journal, meditate, plan the next day’s goals & non-negotiable tasks, & do a wind down yoga session. It’s been rather enjoyable!
- ⏸️ Put a pause on devices: If you don’t set boundaries with your devices, they’ll be running you ragged. I’ve switched up a lot this year: only email with alerts are for my business, the times I’m doing my morning & nighttime routines automatically set to Personal, & DND goes into effect at 9:30pm-6am during the week & 9:30pm-8am on weekends. No more broken sleep cuz someone wants to text me some stupid meme or send spam mail my way.
- 1️⃣ Use your tools to prioritize your time: 2 tools go everywhere with me if I’m spending the night: my Intentional Journal & my Intentional Planner. Whether I write for 2 minutes or 20 minutes, I journal my thoughts out at the end of every day to help decompress. Being busy puts a lot on your brain, but you don’t have to allow it to keep you up all night thinking.
I also plan the next day in my journal & planner. Our journals allow you to add 3 goals for the following day, & our planners give you space to goal plan & block off time to prioritize your obligations, goals, & self-care. Planning makes things so much easier!
So How Do You Avoid a Scheduling Nightmare in the Future? 🔮
Avoiding a scheduling nightmare is possible, but it takes some effort. You can’t just pray or speak about it & think all of the pieces are going to come together. You have to act on them. Check this formula out: 👀
- 🗓️ Grab an Intentional Planner for 2025. You’ll be able to create a vision board & plan your goals for the next year. It’ll also keep you more organized & financially savvy. We added a monthly budget into the mix so you can track your financial goals as well.
I live by this. It’s how I stay on track daily & know what’s priority & what’s not. With kids, a marriage, a full-time job, a small business, being on a nonprofit board, & everything else in between, I need my paper planner as a backup to my digital ones.
- 📓 Grab an Intentional Journal. Any of them will work, although Youthful Reflections is geared towards youth. Between the original journal & our spiritual one, Soulful Serenity, you’ll have plenty of space to plan your self-care & remind yourself of everything you’re grateful for each day. They’re good for your mental health too (which I’m sure will be needed in the next 4 years with all of the shenanigans going on in the U.S. in the political & entertainment worlds).
Journaling is something I’ve been doing consistently since 2009. It helped get me through one of the darkest times of my life, & it‘s been a staple in my life ever since. It allows me to empty my busy mind before bed & leaves me less worried when I’m in that headspace.
- 📋 Make a self-care list & decide how much time you’re going to dedicate to at least one task daily. When you have options, it makes it easier to choose something to do according to how you feel. Block that time off on your calendar & silence alerts on your devices so you don’t get distracted from pouring into yourself.
Variety is where it’s at! I have my daily self-care tasks: my morning & nighttime routines. Then I have some things that I do weekly: working out & being spiritually fed. I sprinkle other little things I enjoy like reading, watching random things on tv, & eating good food. And the best part: mandatory trips every 3-4 months! 🛫 Whether it’s a long weekend roadtrip or flying out of the country, I pause & take a step away from being a responsible adult.
- 🙅🏽♀️ Decline anything that interferes with your Me Time. If it’s not an emergency, it can wait. They make DND options & power buttons on devices for a reason. You’re not obligated to do anything for anyone except your kids & whatever is in your wedding vows…within reason. Be ok with not doing something if you’re not feeling it.
Since my full-time job requires me to be on the phone or in meetings all day, the last thing I want to do is talk on a phone when I get off. I’m not a big talker unless I have something to really say or contribute to the convo, so I have no shame in not answering my phone while I’m off work. Text me or leave me alone.
See, you’ve got options, my Evolvers! If you’re considering joining me on your self-care journey via your Intentional Path by investing in a journal or planner, they’re available on our website or by shooting us a message. Use code ONMYPATH for 20% off your first purchase!
