Look at the Bright Side: Empower Yourself Through Positivity 

It’s tough being a positive person! Like reeeeeeally hard work, especially when you look at the world & notice all of the mess around us 🌎😢. Makes it so easy to fall into the trap of being a Negative Nancy/Nicholas. There is hope, but it starts with you. Switching to Team Positivity is the perfect way to empower yourself & put some sunshine out into the world🌞😎.

Positivity Where??? 

In the beginning, she, me, her, I was a hot mess! Moment of transparency: there was a time when I put the “C” in “cynical.” There wasn’t a person, place, or thing that I trusted 100% 🙅🏽‍♀️. Not my parents, not my boyfriends, not my homegirls, not God, nada, nothing, zero, zilch (you get the point). The naturally inquisitive girl in me just couldn’t take things at face value. I always felt like there was another side, motive, personality, whatever. Flawed people & things bring the potential for hurt & disappointment, & I’d had more than enough of that. 

     When you experience negativity frequently, it’s pretty easy to fall into that frame of mind. Now I’m not saying I had a traumatic childhood, but a lot of the negative things I experienced molded me into that cynical person I was as a teen & young adult. You come to expect the worst from people from jump instead of giving everyone a chance to show you who they are. As we got older, my sisters became my safe space, & not a thing has changed about that. We’re still on a “P.O.P. hold it down” level 💪🏽. Alexa, play “That’s My Dawg.”

     All the way through my 20’s I side-eyed people. Immediately it was “what do you want from me” instead of “what value are you adding to my life.” I don’t remember any marriages being drama-free, so I expected the worst out of relationships. Unfortunately almost all of them showed just that, especially with cheating. My first boyfriend liked lots of female attention, which led me to lose my 💩 one day in the cafeteria. After him, I didn’t think a dude would be faithful & definitely didn’t trust any of the female “friends” they had (Side note: I warned them that their lil friends were after them & was always right. Game recognize game, homie). Needless to say, relationships were far from being on my positivity list ✌🏽. 

     Friendships were decent, but I learned how quickly people turn on each other my senior year of high school. The tight-knit crew that was thick as thieves all 4 years shattered, people chose sides over some trivial mess, & I saw how something small can turn your world upside down 🙃. Thank goodness I’ve pretty much been Switzerland-type neutral in most situations (outside of with my sisters)🇨🇭. It was like a tennis match, but it ended up playing a part in me not trusting friends 100% until we’d been through some major stuff & came out on top together. I only still speak to 1 of that 8 person crew…#sucks but it is what it is 🤷🏽‍♀️.

     And me & God…the questions I had would’ve probably made me people I’m an atheist 😈. I questioned how we know the things in the Bible are accurate. The distrust in me just didn’t believe: #1 the people who wrote the chapters completely told the truth & #2 those who translated it over & over didn’t add their own little twist to it. It’s just the way my brain works. I wasn’t sold on going to church because I didn’t (& still don’t) think you have to go to the building to have a relationship with God. I always thought a little deeper than most 🧐. I have to be made a believer.

     So with all of those factors, I was conditioned to look at the glass being half empty instead of half full 🥃. I had little faith that people could be truly good people. I put up walls like the Great Wall of China & let no one completely in. I stuck to what I knew were facts & let the rest fall wherever. I just wasn’t willing to chance opening up to people, expecting them to do right by me, & then tossing the relationship to the side. And so I became Negative Nancy.

Welcoming Positivity In

Keeping people at an arm’s length paid off somewhat. By sitting back & cautiously watching the way they moved with me & others, I was able to decipher who had the potential to be trusted & who needed to stay at a distance. I guess that’s why I’m not known to deal with most people on a deeper than surface level. I have to catch their vibes first & really get to know them before I let them in🚪. 

     Thank God I was able to see that there are plenty of people who are genuinely good & not out for personal gain 🥰. That took some growth in age & maturity & a helluva lot of life lessons though. I’m blessed to have people around me that are as down for me as I am for them. I’ve learned that it’s ok to grow apart from people. And being exposed to different people, places, things, & mindsets has allowed me to change my negative mindset into a more positive one.

     Once I started journaling, it opened my eyes to how much poison I allowed to infiltrate my mind ☠️. When you go back & read some of your previous thoughts, it’s so much easier to see your growth. It’s one of the reasons I created the Intentional Journal. Hearing “Man in the Mirror” hits a whole lot differently when you truly understand & can relate to the words. It’s another reason I write every night. You have to know where you’ve been to navigate where you’re going 🛣️.

     Learning about positive affirmations was another thing I encountered😘. If you recite something enough, eventually you’ll begin to believe it. Since I like to read, it has become easy for me to read something motivational daily 📖. The more I read them, the more I developed a positive outlook on things. It’s the main reason I find a few at the beginning of every year to recite every morning 🗣️. Start your day off on a positive note, & it’s more likely to be a positive day. It’s another reason why I incorporated affirmations into the Journals & Planners. No harm in reminding yourself who you are!

     We all can use a little sunshine in our lives ☀️. No one is able to have a completely positive life, but you can for sure strive to make it as positive as possible. Get in that mirror & tell yourself how great you are & how much you bring to this world 🪞. Silence the mental demon voice spewing negativity in your head by countering with something positive 🤫🤐. Remember, there are 2 sides to a coin, so you don’t have to stay stuck on one side. Come on over to Team Positivity 🙌🏽!